How to move on after break-ups?

Let’s look at this in terms of life, not in terms of trend or morality, but in terms of life. When I say that, you need to understand that your body contains a lot of memory on various levels. And you need to understand that every day you are imbibing so much memory. Within this memory, if there is a certain kind of congruence, if there is a certain kind of cohesiveness, this memory will become productive. If there is a certain kind of chaos to this memory, then you may know everything but this memory will work against you because it’s contradictory and conflicting within itself.

When you think of a relationship and when you ask the question about how to move on after a break up, the question itself is arising because this relationship mattered to you, isn’t it? If it had not mattered to you, you could have just forgotten about it and gone on with your life, like an old pair of jeans. But it matters to you because you invested your thoughts, your emotions, your body. Once you have invested all these things, there is a profound sense of memory about that.

If you create a lot of contradictory memories in your system, life will tell you later that you have everything but you will feel like you have nothing because your body memory is confused, its joyless. It does not have exuberance. Its very important to understand that the mechanism that you have been provided with, is a very sophisticated machine. If you treat it sensitively, if you treat it properly you can do everything in a phenomenal way, otherwise your body will only do mediocre things. Therefore, before getting in touch with anything, before getting yourself involved in anything, you must foresee what is the level of involvement you wish. You must see where do you want to take this to. You must also see what are the different impacts it will have on you. Whether or not, this will work well for this life or will work against this life. Otherwise you will become a ‘loose life‘. Loose in terms of not fulfilling your aspirations and not following the direction in your life you wish to go in. Bringing some integrity to this life, intellectual integrity, emotional integrity and physical integrity to your life, is very very important. Well, beyond that if something goes wrong, you just have to understand when you were born, you came alone, when you will die, you will go alone.

Even if you put yourself through horrible situations, either you can come out of such an experience as a better human being or you can use it as an experience to become a horrible mess. So whenever something hurts you, there are two options: you can either become wounded or wise. These are the only two choices. The more things hurt you early on in your life, the wiser you become. But unfortunately, most people become wounded. This is simply because they just need an excuse to turn their own intelligence against themselves. That’s all.